Screaming "I am a criminal" while putting on a leather jacket in a  store.

Getting on all fours and going under the table, popping me head out while saying, "Criminals come out at night."

Again on all fours yelling gibberish and rubbing against me friends knees, to which her knees became quite warm.

On me back on the floor crying laughing at turkey cavities.

Telling me superior I'm sorry for saying, "Yo me brotha." She is a woman.

Laughing at green men and power rangers.

Spitting me drink out and getting it all over me leg. 

Almost getting kicked by me friend.

Writing as if I'm a Scottish lad.