I am looking

Out the window

In the backseat

Of this car

On this summer

Day is too perfect

Is too sunny

Is too blue

I am shaking

In the backseat

With my hands

Grasping the arm rest

And my eyes

Grasping the

Roadside flowers

I am not ready

I am begging

The sun to

Hold on tighter

I am not ready

My phone buzzes

And my best friends

Tell me that

They love me

I fiddle for my

White apple earbuds

Which are in

My pink overnight bag

I press play and listen

with eyes closed

To my favorite prayer

For the last time

In the corner I

Catch a reflection

That will never

Be the same

And In the rear view

Mirror I catch

My mother’s eyes

They apologize

She stretches

Her open hands

To hold my own

And smiles

In my head

I play over

My last meal

I am hungry

How far away

Are we from

The hospital

5 minutes?

Away from

The hospital

Where I

Will be broken

I wonder

For how long

I will be

broken?

I need to move

My body while

I still can

But this seat belt

Holds me

Down so

I let loose

My hair instead

I wonder if

I took everything

For granted

Is it too late?

This car

Feels smaller

Than everything

Around it

Did the sky

Slow down

Just for me?