I try to be as clean as possible but let’s be honest, if I make a mess and I’m tired, chances are I won’t clean it up. Not to say I’m a bad roommate, quite the contrary in fact. I never make any noise and although you might occasionally hear me crying myself to sleep, it should be quiet enough to block out. I have very basic knowledge of cooking so if you ever aska me to help you make food, don’t hold me accountable if you get salmonella.

On a brighter note: I hate TV so you can watch whatever you want-whenever you want. I also always wear black so you never have to worry about me accidentally stealing your clothes. You might occasionally hear me talking to someone who isn’t there, but don’t worry, it’s just me having a casual seance with Joan Rivers, my guardian angel.  

As you can see, I’m going to be a great roommate. Just can’t wait to ignore you for the entire semester! See you soon!

Condolences

D. Jenner